I’m not a big fan of labels. They tend to leave us more disconnected rather than moving in the direction of mutual care and understanding. With a few exceptions.
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We say this to kids a bunch, don’t we? I’m not sure it's the best advice. I’m thinking the kids are onto something more accurate.
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It turns out I have been ‘forced’ to wear the wrong size shoe for the majority of my life. I choose to wear a size 9. Because I have a high arch and a wide foot, a 9 felt right-enough, meaning it would go on, although often tight across my foot, and bit too long. Long story short, it turns out an 8-1/2 wide is a perfect fit!
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What are people really saying to you? You can use these barometers to help you understand what is important to the person you are speaking with --and also for yourself, when you might be confused.
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The last time I was in a meeting with a group of people, one person (emphatically) offered an opinion of what next steps we should take on a project. Almost instantly, the energy in the room changed. An awkward quiet descended and the air whooshed out of the room. Why? It turns out that others in the room had quite a different opinion. So what?
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