Hiring + Firing Tips for the Workplace (also Good Relationship Advice)

I recorded a podcast with Kate Jaramillo who coaches a variety health practitioners in having wildly successful practices.  She asked me to talk about communication around hiring and firing.  I made a few notes so here they are.  Well…I added a few things.

Considering hiring someone to join you in your workplace or work process is just like any other relationship.  One of the upsides in the hiring process is the socially accepted protocol of asking specific questions.  It is completely anticipated and acceptable to ask a whole bunch of questions to see if the partnership will be a good match.  Quite frankly, I hope you might consider these tips equally important when diving into personal relationships as well.  So many times in coaching sessions, clients cringe when I suggest they pull out a sheet of questions on date one or two.  What the client usually says, “It is too soon, we need a little time to get to know each other.”  What I hear (just so you know) is “Okay, I will not ask directly for what I want.  Any relationship is better than no relationship”.  My response is, “If they aren’t up for the relationship you describe, or the needs you value, then why would you want another date?”  Anyway, I am off topic.  In the context of this article, would you hire someone who wasn’t into doing what you are hoping for?

 Here’s a short list of things to consider when hiring someone.

1.  Know what your needs are.

Obviously the first need is good skills in whatever you are hiring them to do. All candidates are likely to have (or at least say they have) the skills to perform the work you are asking them to do.  Do your due diligence to see if they can do it, although with all of these things, it will be in the first few months that you will discover what’s really true. 

Beyond that, knowing what is important to you is key in finding someone who you want on your team.  Someone who in addition to performing the tasks required, they will also contribute in these other ways.

Examples in my case it would be: Dependability, Humor, Meaning and Purpose in their life – that they have a sense of a fulfilled life (or at least want one), Creativity, Persistence, Honesty

Some of these skillsets are even a little more important to me than being a wiz at the task I am hiring them for.  I am okay with someone making mistakes or taking time to figure something out, if they show up on time and tell the truth.  

Identify what is important to you.  What kind of atmosphere do you want to be working in?  Possibly some needs are:  partnership, communication, responsibility.  Knowing this is critical to a successful and pleasant working relationship.   These are the things you are going to be tracking on as you move forward in the relationship.  You are committed to the needs being met, rather than a particular person.  The person, after all, is a strategy to meet needs.  Just the same as when you are developing a personal relationship in the hopes of partnership.  It won’t matter ‘how great the person is’ if yours or their needs aren’t being met in the relationship.  

2.  Do some investigating about what needs they are wanting to meet by taking the position you are offering.

Likely all candidates will want some sense of security (money).  Beyond that, what else are they hoping for?  Learning?  Are they interested in your product/offerings/business/even how to do the job?  Community?  Are they inspired by the work and want to be around a bunch of people.  Shared Reality?  Inspiration?  Meaning and Purpose?

This might be more important than you think for a few reasons.  One is so you can set expectations. If they are hoping to learn about your particular business you can track it and make it part of the exchange by setting up ½ hour a week to answer questions (as an example). Or you can tell them that you won’t want to spend the time to teach them some extra tricks of the trade.   If you know they want to be in a community where they can make a difference, you might be mindful of creating opportunities for them to contribute to the community (or your clients) in some way.  

Conversely if they are looking for community, and it will be just the two of you working, then you might want to let them know that likely that will be a source of longing for them in this position.  

Let them know during your interview process that you will be tracking all these things, in addition to performance of the required tasks.  Basically letting them know that yes, it is important that they can do the job you are asking for.  And you are anticipating a bit more…letting them know what else.  Examples:  attitude, how they show up for work, enthusiasm…whatever you have identified as important.

Remember if your co-workers/employee’s needs aren’t getting met, then likely neither will yours.  Satisfied employees make for a more wonderful workplace.  Also consider the wok environment you want to create, for yourself and for others.   Most work environments are like this:  Employee thinking:  I make good money, so it is worth whatever I have to put up with.  Employer thinking:  They do a very good job, so it’s okay that they complain all day.  In most work environments most people are semi or mostly unsatisfied.  Is this what you want?

3.  You aren’t looking for friendship.  Hopefully your working relationship will be so good that you want to spend time together and become friends.  Yet that isn’t what you are hiring for.  In this case, please don’t confuse friendship with respect, and care and cooperation.  This will be important for the next topic…

Evaluations.  I prefer the word check-ins, yet it doesn’t sound so professional does it?

Evaluations are an inquiry into the relationship.  In the classic NVC way you are evaluating if needs are being met or not.   If they aren’t, then brainstorming new strategies to meet them is what’s next. This, rather than a moralistic judgement about ‘their performance’.  Better said that your needs for ‘something’ aren’t being met in the ways that the person is doing the work, or speaking to other people, or showing up for appointments, etc. (as an example).  Again, for those of you in partnership relationships, this is the same.  Do you have regular check-ins?  

 Schedule evaluations in the calendar.  

Scheduling these talks ahead of time sets you up for success.  Often it is challenging to bring things up because you don’t want to rock the boat.  Or ‘make someone feel bad’.  It is easier just to let it go (which, of course, doesn’t actually happen).  Resentments build and tensions rise and the workplace (your relationship?) becomes more and more unsatisfying and uncomfortable.  If you have these check-ins scheduled, it is much easier to actually say what is necessary to get back to mutual understanding and navigate the challenges when they are small and no one has months of unresolved resentment (which they blame they other person for).  In the beginning, one week intervals, quick check-ins. Then when things are smooth and it becomes unnecessary, the time between these check-ins will organically become spaced out further and further.  It is uncommon, yet it will set you up for success.  How can you wait for 3 months to pass if you have things to talk about just because it is the common workplace protocol?  I wonder the same thing when thinking about personal relationships.  How long do you want to put off the uncomfortable conversation, when you notice ‘little things’?  It only gets more challenging when those little things are now big things, and you are dealing with your own resentment and frustration.

I encourage a climate where both parties get to speak up without punishment.  In these evaluations, having the employee speak freely about what needs of theirs are challenged will help design a pleasant workplace. 

Check-ins?  Check!

FIRING —for those who are getting the similarity in personal relationships, read BREAKING UP.

It should NOT be a surprise (unless there is theft or blatant unacceptable rule breaking).

If you follow the suggestions encouraged above, then by the time you are ready to ask for a significant change (firing/breaking up), all parties are anticipating the relationship adjustment.  In my perfect world, there would be celebration and honoring of what did get accomplished together, acknowledgement that you aren’t a match for this kind of relationship and well-wishing or even more kinds of support moving forward.  It is rare, yet it does happen and it is quite refreshing.  

Remember, you don’t have to be mad, or make someone wrong to change the nature of relationship (firing/breaking up).  You can acknowledge that you (plural) couldn’t find the strategies for all needs to be met inside the context of the relationship you were creating, so it just wasn’t a good match. 

 One more thing…

If you are crystal clear about wanting everyone’s needs being met inside a working (or any kind of relationship) and you are crystal clear what your needs are and you can clearly state them over and over, and you can get creative about how all needs might get met (yours and the other person’s) —in the case of work, adding the needs of your organization, and you are persistent, knowing that not everyone is the perfect candidate, and you are not willing to give up on your needs, yet remain creative about how they get met, I am optimistic that you can find that perfect match.  In work and in love.