While we say we are desperately seeking connection, many times it is lost because of our own behaviors, choices and communication, rather than what another person is doing. This is good news!
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Tone of voice can be a way we share our feelings without revealing (or even knowing) what those feelings are. It can be hidden disappointment, anger, hurt coming out (intentionally or not) as a sucker punch to the person we are talking to.
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A lot of the struggle people have when trying to communicate (difficult) things with each other is the meaning they make of what they hear. Discussions are rushed. We rarely take the time to slow down and hear each other.
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Is asking for (and getting) what you want selfish? Read on to explore the difference between being selfish and self-centered. The second is a stepping stone to creating amazing relationships.
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One of the primary touchstones of compassionate consciousness is that we hold everyone’s needs dear. Meaning in our relationships we are considering solutions or strategies that meet the needs of all involved. It’s a we thing. I have found that this is a place where people get a bit stuck.
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There are a few things I have become aware over many years of teaching and learning NVC and how to relate effectively with other people. One is that we want a script. I think it is one of the appealing things in this work. There is a structure.
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Seems like a simple question. With two obvious answers.
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Marshall Rosenberg wrote and talked about ‘tragic suicidal ways to get our needs met’. Most couples get into coupledom for the purpose of meaningful connection. Why is this so elusive?
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